Thoughts?

One tactic I have used recently is to point out similar mistakes by the client’s competition. I would gather that this is what ‘Great Management’ is talking about. I agree with your assessment that you have to know the client. Some will take that as an affirmation that they’re doing it the right way when they really aren’t.

Tom,
I think you’re right. Yet there has to be a balance between allowing the status quo and ‘forcing’ change. I agree with the above comments that you’re paid to bring change.

Thoughts?

Jared,
I agree, actually. I think each relationship, however, requires a different tactic. The most effective leaders and coaches are those who can understand where their clients are and meet them there. Then begin to nudge them in a manner that’s appropriate for their circumstances, need and personality.

No reason to push change when the client isn’t open to it. Rather use different tactics to help the client grow.

Melody,
It does, exactly. That’s what I’ve been saying in the comments above. There’s no cookie cutter method for dealing with clients. You have to be fluid.

Robert,
I agree in theory. But isn’t getting there done in the action? If so, the actions may need to be different for different clients, no?

How? I guess it depends on the client and what motivates them.

However, in a business setting I think my clients are often paying for the hand-holding, the nudging, and my willingness to take a stake in their success. If I go in and then leave, remaining detached, and don’t offer my opinions when they don’t take my advice, then my clients won’t grow nearly as much as if I try to gently move them in the direction I’m helping them to travel.

While the quote could be used as a rationalization, I know you’re not using it that way. I just want to point out that some of the greatest successes come from sticking it out to make an impact, even if you’re just the outside consultant.

Great blog, look forward to meeting you in Chicago!

I would tell them they are wasting their money and ask why they would want to do that?

That might spark them into action or we may have to part company.

Andrew

Steve,
First, great to see you back.

Keeping thing clear is essential in any contract. And I think it’s even more important for coaches/consultants because often deliverable have more to do with intellectual information than actual things. So both parties need to be clear on what’s expected, don’t you think?

Akhmad,
For the most part, I think you’re right. It seems a bit disingenuous to just sit back and not prod the client to change when they’re paying you to help them overcome their struggles. Yet, at the same time, I don’t think there’s one way that works for everyone. Don’t you think that different types of clients, in different circumstance, need different approaches?

Jenny,
Which part?

I see this issue have similarities with principle on public speaking; that it’s about Giving, instead of Receiving. What it means is we should be fully aware that we are there truly to help. We are doing it with Passion that is based on Sincerity. But it isnt necessarily mean being indefferent.

Been a coach/consultant/advisor for 30 years and the thread here is the real deal.

A couple of things that made me smile:

1. Coach/consultant/advisor. I still don’t know, either. What I finally realized is that each client will simply call me whatever is comfortable for them.

2. 90% of success lies in the contracting phase of what we do. If, in haste to do a gig, one doesn’t take time to carefully define the elements,, someone isn’t going to be satisfied.

Keep writing. . .

Lisa,
I’ve always thought that if you actually learned something, it’s never a waste of time.

You never know what people hear or understand from what we say. What appears helpful to us may not be and vise-versa. All I know that is that often people hear more of how we deliver the message than the message itself. Have you experienced that?

I wish I’d heard that quote long ago. I had to learn it on my own. I used to feel discouraged when people didn’t take my advice. Like I’d wasted my time. What I’ve come to realize is that it doesn’t matter whether they took my advice or not. The conversation still had value. The client has had the opportunity to talk it out, weigh options, get perspective, etc. Often they will remember the advice months or years later and wish they’d taken it. Or maybe the conversation helped them stay strong in their own course which may have been the right thing for them anyway. There is always something of value in just talking about it. For both parties.

Lisa

Andrew

Margaret,
That’s the stumbling I’ve seen a lot – the ‘right way.’ There’s no right way. Yet there are ways that are more direct or less direct to the goals. That’s where our expertise comes in, don’t you think?