If you use WordPress you likely know who Lorelle VanFossen is. If you don’t know who she is yet, don’t worry…you will soon.

Lorelle VanFossen, of course, writes Lorelle on WordPress (RSS) – one of the best resources for anything relating to WordPress. Need a plugin? Lorelle’s likely written about it. Need to solve a problem? Lorelle may have covered it. Want the latest news? Lorelle’s the one. She even sums it all up with her WordPress Wednesday column on Blog Hearld (RSS).

Lorelle’s done it all. Including make every blogging mistake possible. At least that’s what she said in her interview with Daniel Scocco from Daily Blog Tips (RSS).

Daniel: What is the biggest blogging mistake you did?

Lorelle: Oh, honey, I’ve done them all. I’ve been doing this so long, I’ve done all the big mistakes. When I read through blog posts listing their blogging mistakes, I think, “Yep, did that one in 2001. Oh, that one, I did it big in 1998. Been there, done that in 2004. Won’t repeat that mistake of 1997.”

Is there just one big mistake? Nope. There are only big lessons that come from every mistake along the blogging path. I tend to focus on the lessons learned and not the screw-ups.

Lessons…that’s the perspective I love about Lorelle. Having spent some time with her at SOBCon07 back in May, it was easy to fall in love with her. She’s real, she’s honest and she doesn’t judge. And just like me, she has her opinions…

Daniel: How long should a blogger wait to monetize the blog?

Lorelle: I do not think bloggers should monetize their blogs. I think that people who want to get into the business of blogging must make a business plan on how they will use blogging for their business or as their business, thus creating a plan for monetizing their blogs.

But general bloggers? Why should your hobby make money? If you want to work your way towards professional blogging, then blog for a year or two to get a feel for blogging and make your business plan. Then move towards being a professional blogger.

I couldn’t agree more. Too many bloggers are watching what the business bloggers are doing and think about the “easy money” they could be making off their blogs. But it’s not easy money. It’s hard work.

But so is blogging in general. Some days it’s easy, some it’s hard. Everyday it’s effort. That’s why many blogs aren’t successful.
And that’s what I love about Lorelle, she tells it like it is. She doesn’t sugar coat it. She’s honest about the ups and downs. That why I recommend that everyone read her new book, Blogging Tips, What Bloggers Won’t Tell You About Blogging.

I’ve read it three times cover to cover and it’s full of great advice. It’s literally the first blogging book I’ve read that’s really about blogging. Most blog books spend way too much time covering blog platforms or why to blog. Authors sometimes spend 1/2 to 3/4 of a book getting to the meat.

Blogging Tips is different in that Lorelle assumes you’ll get that type of information elsewhere. Instead, she gets right into meat. I highly recommend her book (and I’m not getting an affiliate kickback to say that).

I also really enjoyed Adii’s interview with Lorelle where they talk a bit more WordPress.

You know, it’s also kind of challenging to find photos of Lorelle. I snagged one with her and David Dalka (he’s on the right, I’m on the left and Lorelle is between us) when we were at SOBCon.

Are you blogging to build relationships? I sure am. And so are many other bloggers.

Sure, if we’re blogging, we probably like to write. We also probably enjoy playing on the internet to some degree. And for many of us, we’ve got businesses to promote. Yet the reason many of us blog is to create conversations. And those conversations lead to relationships with people from all over the world.

Just imagine how disappointing it’d be to have your posts generate conversations that lead bloggers to contact you only to have you drop the ball by not responding. This is like inviting someone to a lunch where you spend the whole time talking to someone else on your cell phone. Not the way to build a relationship.

Bloggers want to reach out. They want to get a viceral feeling for who you are. Doing so takes a little courage on their part. And not following through sends the message that you just don’t care.

So, here are five quick-and-easy ways to be sure you don’t make the biggest mistake in your blogging relationships:

1. Reply Immediately by Email
   Sending a two sentence email right away that thanks them for contact you is can send more of a positive message than a well crafted longer message two days later. The immediate response makes the other person feel like they’re important to you.
2. Send an Instant Message
   If they publish their IM Screen Name, use it to contact them as soon as you can. Sometimes this can lead to a brief virtual conversation that can be picked up later.
3. Set an Appointment
   Even if you’re busy, take a few moments and respond to their message by inviting a time to talk later. Scheduling an appointment time for a brief (or lenghthy) conversation can be an effective way to meet them without stopping your current work flow.
4. Call Them Out of the Blue
   If you have the time, respond with a phone call instead of an email. This can create quite the impression. I once had a well-known blogger send me an email saying that she was going to phone me at ’1 pm today.’ She did and we had a great talk.
5. Be Honest About How Busy You Are
   If you’re really busy and can’t get a bit of time away, let them know. People understand. A polite message letting them know that you’d love to meet them soon, but you’re currently under a deadline crunch can easily get the point across without seeming like a blow-off.

If you’re blogging to build relationships be sure to respond to people who contact you. Not doing so will send the wrong message.

Have you made the biggest mistake in your blogging relationships? How have you made up for it? What do you do to not make the biggest mistake?

There are, of course, plenty of other mistakes you can make with your blog. Here’s a few other posts where people have offered up the wisdom of their own experiences…

• The Top Ten Blogging Mistakes I Made In My First Year – eMomsatHome
• Missed Opportunities Are Worse Then Making Mistakes – ProBlogger
  
• 10 Blog Mistakes / Why Your Blog Struggles – Seach-This
  
• 3 Blog Mistakes You Can Avoid – Lee Odden
• 10 Mistakes That Will Kill A Forum…or A Blog – ProBlogger
• 10 Common Blog Writing Mistakes and How To Fix Them – Rich Minx
• Top 5 Mistakes Made When Naming Your Website Or Company – Chitika’s Blog
• 10 Blogging Mistakes I’ve Made – Webomatica
• Top 10 SEO Mistakes – PhoenixRealm
• Twenty Usability Tips For Your Blog – Condensed From Dozens of Bloggers’ Experiences – I’d Rather Be Writing

Many bloggers, like Preston, have asked this question of whether they should fake comments on their blogs to begin the conversation. Darren Rowse had some great advice. As did Jason Kaneshiro from Webomatica and Dee of Blogozine.

They each had some great suggestions of writing more conversationally and more often, asking direct questions of your readers, and having realistic expectations. Also, consider creating a comment policy, and removing no-follow. All these are really great suggestions.

But I was thinking…what do we want from our blogs? If we want comments we probably want conversation. And if we want conversation, we likely want to create relationships. And through relationships, there’s even the chance we could create community.

So if we want conversation, relationship and, eventually, community through our blogs, why not just jump right in?

How? Find other new or newish bloggers whose content you enjoy. Sure, leave some comments on their blogs. You know they’ll come a visit. If they jive with your content, they’ll likely leave a comment or two also. If so, email them and start a dialogue.

That parts all pretty straight-forward, huh? You’ve probably heard that before.

But let’s go one step further…create an agreement where you comment on each other’s posts. That way the conversation can get started on both your blogs. And there’s no need to fake comments.

The beautiful thing is that your agreement has the potential of developing into a relationship that could help you both grow your blogs – and perhaps your business. And if nothing else, you’ll make more friends in the blogosphere.

So, have you tried this? If so, what have been the results?

Mike Sansone of Converstations has posted a simple seven question test that can help you decide if you’re ready for a business blog.

The test takes about two minutes. You calculate your score at the end. Mike then gives you three categories of blogging readiness based on how you answer the questions.

If you’re uncertain about whether you’re ready to blog about your business or not, this quick test can help.

And if you want to talk about it more, give me a call (734/475-4387) for a free 25-minute phone consultation. We can discuss your circumstance and I can help you decide on the best strategy for moving forward.

Finding the right domain name can make a difference between a successful website and one that’s stuck in the pit of mediocrity. Okay, maybe it’s not that dramatic, but there is some truth here.

The question is, how importat is the .com? Should you get closetowhatIwant.com or should you get exactlywhatIwant.net or even mybusinessname.biz?

Alex King has been facing this exactly question as he renames his business from King Design to Crowd Favorite. Of course, he couldn’t wrestle crowdfavorite.com away from its current owner. So he came up with either using crowdfavorite.net or crowdfave.com.

Which would you choose? And why?

Alex polled his readers and got mixed feedback with crowdfavorite.net winning out by a small margin. Which was good because he had already decided to use crowdfavorite.net. But as he said it, “the response to crowdfave.com has gotten my attention. This decision is holding up a number of things, but I want to make sure I’ve thought it through completely.”

Personally, I’ve always held the position that the .com was ultimately better. And unless you really couldn’t find one you like, you should always choose a .com.

A couple of the comments Alex got made me think about this position, though. Brian Warren of Be Good Not Bad suggested:

…i’d rather have a .net domain and have it be the name of my company than have a .com and have it not.

Others had similar feedback. And there’s some great advice “out there” on selecting a domain name:

• @ Chrisg: Better Blog Branding: What’s in a Name?
• @ DomainName: Quick Tips on Choosing a Domain Name
• @ Dosh Dosh: 5 Easy Steps to Choose a Domain Name for Your Niche Blog
• @ Quick Spout: How to Choose A Brandable Domain Name
• @ Can I Make Big Money Online: How to Pick the Right Domain Name for Your Blog

But what do you think? Is a .com the only way to go? Or does the extention matter that much today?

I love to read. Yet being a solopreneur, a husband, a father, a constructrion worker (I’ve just gutted our kitchen), a friend, etc – it’s hard to find time to read as much as I’d like.

So Doug Karr helped me out yesterday when he posted about the book, The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz & Don Jose Luis Ruiz.

From the book’s back cover: The Four Agreements…“reveals the source of self-limiting beliefs that rob us of joy and create needless suffering. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, the Four Agreements offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives to a new experience of freedom: true happiness and love”

Sounds pretty powerful, huh? So, then, what are the Four Agreements?

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
3. Don’t Make Assumptions
4. Always Do Your Best

Of course, this is great advice for life in general. It’s great advice for marriage, parenting and all relationships.

Which is why I immediately thought about it as a conversational blogger publisher. For me, each are essential for creating conversation and building relationships with you…

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
   Simple, mean what you say. Don’t lie, cheat or steal. And above all, be honest – even when it hurts a little.
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
   I do my best to share myself through my blog. But truly you’ll only really know me when we build a personal, long-term friendship.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions
   I try not to make assumptions about anyone who comments on my blog. Rather, I look at each comment as a chance to get to know a person a little better.
4. Always Do Your Best
   I don’t always write absolutely killer posts – I know that. But even the ones that aren’t interesting, I still tried to do the best I could in the moment – and I’m happy with the effort.

Aren’t these great? Simple, yet powerful concepts.

I’ve not (yet) read the book. I may. Though there’s many books already on my reading list. If you’re interested in the book, here are some reviews I found:

• Book Review – The Four Agreements – Your Key To Inner Transformation! at Matrimony Express
  
• The Four Agreements – Don Miquel Ruiz at Erica’s Reviews
  
• Book Review: The Four Agreements (links to another site for review)
• The Four Agreements by Don Miquel Ruiz at Gather
  
• The Four Agreements at Pencil Pushin’
  
• The Four Agreements at Dwell On These Things
• The Four Agreements at The Clinton Review
• The Four Agreements at Viva Las Vegas

So you know a bit of what I think. What I’d really like to know is what you think. How do you see each/any of the four agreements as essential (or nonessential) to being a conversational blogger?

Believe it or not, I’ve actually said this to a few clients – that conversational blogging is like a conga line. I know it’s sounds funny, but it’s true.

Think about it.

• When do we conga? Usually at a party. Well, isn’t conversational blogging is like a party?
• Someone has to start the conga, of course. Who’s that? It’s me! (or you, if it’s your blog)
• Da-da-da-da-daaa…DA! – enough said!
• You know you want to join in, but you’re afraid of looking like a fool. Sounds like commenting.
• Some conga lines just go on forever.

You thought I was kidding, didn’t you? But I wasn’t. Conversational blogging is really like the conga. And to participate, you’ve gotta join in.

Of course, I wouldn’t have thought to share my blogging metaphor if it wasn’t for Char’s How Do You Explain Blogging to Your Mom? You’ve gotta take a read – she does a great job comparing blogging to a farmer’s market. Lara even picked up on the theme.

Liz also inspired me by beginning her Group Writing Project: What’s Your Blog’s Metaphor. Mine, is the conga. There are others. But this is the one I want to share right now. Perhaps more will come out later.

Other’s have picked up the writing project with some great entries. Karin thinks of blogging as Business Network International while Des sees blogging as a cocktail party. Kathy makes a nice relationship between blogging and exercise.

Off of Ian’s Messy Desk comes the idea of blogging being like Forrest Gump’s “life is like a box of chocolates”. Just so happens that I’m a big Gump fan myself. Forrest would have been a great blogger…“stupid is as stupid does”. Or…“from that day forward, if I was goin’ somewhere, I was runnin’!”

Lots of people see blogging related to food. Juggling Frogs compares blogging to a smorgasbord yet Word Sell sees it as The Salad Bar. The most interesting food comparison, though, comes from Mike – who sees blogging as Feeding on Plankton.

So how do you see blogging? What’s your blogging metaphor?

You know I have to tag a few people. So I’d love to hear from Adam Kayce, David Airey, Chris Cree, Kammie Kobyleski, Kent Blumberg, Barry Zweibel, Sean Rox, thepaperbull, Mark Goodyear, Randa Clay and the Purple Wren.

That’s a lot of folks, huh? And I still want to ask you…what’s your blogging metaphor? And, tell me how you see blogging to be like a conga line.

Koala photo from FunnyZoo.

UPDATE: Be sure to let Liz know about your blogging metaphor post so that she can give you all a little link love.Â

What inspires you?

For me, it’s my kids, my wife, a rolling thunderstorm across the plains, a fresh mountain snow above timberline in September, the sound of water falling from a cliff – okay, really anything involving nature.

And words. Words that express depth and meaning. Words that, together, make me think or feel or taste the layers of living.

A couple of weeks back I wrote 5 Inspirational Quotes For Conversational Blogging as a part of Darren Rowse’s last writing project.

Of course, being me I couldn’t stop with 5. Instead I had to write 8. And the truth is that there were many more I didn’t include. So I thought I’d share five more with you. Five more quotes written by people who weren’t even alive to see the personal computer, let alone the internet or a blog. Five more quotes that relate to conversational blogging…

• It is in giving oneself that one receives – St. Francsis of Assisi
  Everything worthwhile in the blogosphere begins with giving. The conversational blogger knows this so they spend their time giving in the best ways they can – by writing, commenting and linking.
• It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. – Aristotle
  The conversational blogger isn’t concerned with being right or being persuaded. Instead, they adopt a sharing, open dialogue with their readers that may entice debate or further conversation, but rarely into argument about who’s right or wrong.
• The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. – St. Augustine
  Same with the blogosphere. There are conversations in every corner of the blogosphere. The conversational blogger searches out the ones that interest them most and adds what they can to the conversation.
• It doesn’t matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop – Confucius
  Consistency is really the key to a conversational blogger’s success. They’re not in it for the race. Rather they meet the blogosphere at a pace that they can sustain.
• Rather fail with honor than succeed by fraud – Sophocles
  Staying true to themselves it what makes the conversational blogger succeed – even if their blog does not. It’s more important to them to be honest and authentic then to just have a popular blog.

Okay, fine, one more…

• The greatest mistake in life is to be in constant fear that you’ll make one – Elbert Hubbard
  As conversational bloggers, we mess up from time to time. And it just so happens that are mess ups happen in front of everyone. But hey, who’s perfect anyhow? Not me. And I’m going to continue to make mistakes so that I can learn something I didn’t know.

So there’s six more inspirational quotes that can help the conversational blogger. Each of these speak to me in different ways. I’d love to hear how any of them speak to you.

Do you have a favorite quote of your own that helps guide your blogging? I’d love it if you would share it.

There I was sitting at SOBCon07 over the weekend enjoying the speakers and the conversations they started. Soaking in all kinds of great ideas for taking my blog the conversation (and my business) to the next level.

Then, out of nowhere he said it…what’s been on my mind since I began writing publicly. The meaning in the question I asked weeks back.
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You’ve probably seen this meme going around called the Ultimate Technorati Favorites Exchange. Dosh Dosh Gary Lee kicked it off as an experiment to “break into the Technorati Top 100 and determine the exposure and traffic benefits of being included in the Top 100 list.”

Now this ISN’T the Technorati Top 100 Blogs – which is a list of the 100 most linked to blogs. This meme was about breaking into the Top 100 Favorited blogs on Technorati. Very different.

Well, with a lot of work and a whole bunch of links from other bloggers (thank you, by the way), I got into the top 100 last Tuesday. “Pretty neat,” I thought, “Now let’s see how it increases my traffic.”

So giving it a week or so, I checked my traffic this morning and found no change in the past week for referrers coming from Technorati. I did have a massive spike that began on Friday and went through the weekend. But that came from StumbleUpon.
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