Is marketing about transactions? Is it about communication? Is it about conversations? Or is it about relationships?

Of course, marketing isn’t about one thing in particular. Yet marketing tends to focus on one, specific outcome – often the transaction. But what happens if we only focus on marketing as, say, a transaction? Who benefits?

Here’s a great story a friend of mine shared with me. It’s a conversation between Doc Searls and a Nigerian Pastor named Sayo. It begins with Doc explaining the chapter he and David Weinberger wrote in the Cluetrain Manifesto called Markets are Conversations…

…After hearing (about ‘markets are conversations’), he acknowledged that our observations were astute, but also incomplete. Something more was going on in markets than just transactions and conversations, he said. What was it?

I said I didn’t know. Here is the dialogue that followed, as close to verbatim as I can recall it…

“Pretend this is a garment”, Sayo said, picking up one of those blue airplane pillows. “Let’s say you see it for sale in a public market in my country, and you are interested in buying it. What is your first question to the seller?”

“What does it cost?” I said.

“Yes”, he answered. “You would ask that. Let’s say he says, ‘Fifty dollars’. What happens next?”

“If I want the garment, I bargain with him until we reach an agreeable price.”

“Good. Now let’s say you know something about textiles. And the two of you get into a long conversation where both of you learn much from each other. You learn about the origin of the garment, the yarn used, the dyes, the name of the artist, and so on. He learns about how fabric is made in your country, how distribution works, and so on. In the course of this you get to know each other. What happens to the price?”

“Maybe I want to pay him more and he wants to charge me less”.

“Yes. And why is that?”

“I’m not sure.”

“You now have a relationship”.

Their conversation goes on to talk about the importance of relationship in public markets. “Transaction still matters, of course. So does conversation. But the biggest wedge in the social pie of the public marketplace is relationship. Price is less set than found, and the context for finding prices is both conversation and relationship. In many cases, relationship is the primary concern, not price.”

What do you think? What’s the reason behind your marketing? Is it just to land business? Or is your marketing about something else? Or both? I’d love to talk about this…

I love to read. Yet being a solopreneur, a husband, a father, a constructrion worker (I’ve just gutted our kitchen), a friend, etc – it’s hard to find time to read as much as I’d like.

So Doug Karr helped me out yesterday when he posted about the book, The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz & Don Jose Luis Ruiz.

From the book’s back cover: The Four Agreements…“reveals the source of self-limiting beliefs that rob us of joy and create needless suffering. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, the Four Agreements offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives to a new experience of freedom: true happiness and love”

Sounds pretty powerful, huh? So, then, what are the Four Agreements?

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
3. Don’t Make Assumptions
4. Always Do Your Best

Of course, this is great advice for life in general. It’s great advice for marriage, parenting and all relationships.

Which is why I immediately thought about it as a conversational blogger publisher. For me, each are essential for creating conversation and building relationships with you…

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
   Simple, mean what you say. Don’t lie, cheat or steal. And above all, be honest – even when it hurts a little.
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
   I do my best to share myself through my blog. But truly you’ll only really know me when we build a personal, long-term friendship.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions
   I try not to make assumptions about anyone who comments on my blog. Rather, I look at each comment as a chance to get to know a person a little better.
4. Always Do Your Best
   I don’t always write absolutely killer posts – I know that. But even the ones that aren’t interesting, I still tried to do the best I could in the moment – and I’m happy with the effort.

Aren’t these great? Simple, yet powerful concepts.

I’ve not (yet) read the book. I may. Though there’s many books already on my reading list. If you’re interested in the book, here are some reviews I found:

• Book Review – The Four Agreements – Your Key To Inner Transformation! at Matrimony Express
  
• The Four Agreements – Don Miquel Ruiz at Erica’s Reviews
  
• Book Review: The Four Agreements (links to another site for review)
• The Four Agreements by Don Miquel Ruiz at Gather
  
• The Four Agreements at Pencil Pushin’
  
• The Four Agreements at Dwell On These Things
• The Four Agreements at The Clinton Review
• The Four Agreements at Viva Las Vegas

So you know a bit of what I think. What I’d really like to know is what you think. How do you see each/any of the four agreements as essential (or nonessential) to being a conversational blogger?

Believe it or not, I’ve actually said this to a few clients – that conversational blogging is like a conga line. I know it’s sounds funny, but it’s true.

Think about it.

• When do we conga? Usually at a party. Well, isn’t conversational blogging is like a party?
• Someone has to start the conga, of course. Who’s that? It’s me! (or you, if it’s your blog)
• Da-da-da-da-daaa…DA! – enough said!
• You know you want to join in, but you’re afraid of looking like a fool. Sounds like commenting.
• Some conga lines just go on forever.

You thought I was kidding, didn’t you? But I wasn’t. Conversational blogging is really like the conga. And to participate, you’ve gotta join in.

Of course, I wouldn’t have thought to share my blogging metaphor if it wasn’t for Char’s How Do You Explain Blogging to Your Mom? You’ve gotta take a read – she does a great job comparing blogging to a farmer’s market. Lara even picked up on the theme.

Liz also inspired me by beginning her Group Writing Project: What’s Your Blog’s Metaphor. Mine, is the conga. There are others. But this is the one I want to share right now. Perhaps more will come out later.

Other’s have picked up the writing project with some great entries. Karin thinks of blogging as Business Network International while Des sees blogging as a cocktail party. Kathy makes a nice relationship between blogging and exercise.

Off of Ian’s Messy Desk comes the idea of blogging being like Forrest Gump’s “life is like a box of chocolates”. Just so happens that I’m a big Gump fan myself. Forrest would have been a great blogger…“stupid is as stupid does”. Or…“from that day forward, if I was goin’ somewhere, I was runnin’!”

Lots of people see blogging related to food. Juggling Frogs compares blogging to a smorgasbord yet Word Sell sees it as The Salad Bar. The most interesting food comparison, though, comes from Mike – who sees blogging as Feeding on Plankton.

So how do you see blogging? What’s your blogging metaphor?

You know I have to tag a few people. So I’d love to hear from Adam Kayce, David Airey, Chris Cree, Kammie Kobyleski, Kent Blumberg, Barry Zweibel, Sean Rox, thepaperbull, Mark Goodyear, Randa Clay and the Purple Wren.

That’s a lot of folks, huh? And I still want to ask you…what’s your blogging metaphor? And, tell me how you see blogging to be like a conga line.

Koala photo from FunnyZoo.

UPDATE: Be sure to let Liz know about your blogging metaphor post so that she can give you all a little link love.Â

What inspires you?

For me, it’s my kids, my wife, a rolling thunderstorm across the plains, a fresh mountain snow above timberline in September, the sound of water falling from a cliff – okay, really anything involving nature.

And words. Words that express depth and meaning. Words that, together, make me think or feel or taste the layers of living.

A couple of weeks back I wrote 5 Inspirational Quotes For Conversational Blogging as a part of Darren Rowse’s last writing project.

Of course, being me I couldn’t stop with 5. Instead I had to write 8. And the truth is that there were many more I didn’t include. So I thought I’d share five more with you. Five more quotes written by people who weren’t even alive to see the personal computer, let alone the internet or a blog. Five more quotes that relate to conversational blogging…

• It is in giving oneself that one receives – St. Francsis of Assisi
  Everything worthwhile in the blogosphere begins with giving. The conversational blogger knows this so they spend their time giving in the best ways they can – by writing, commenting and linking.
• It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. – Aristotle
  The conversational blogger isn’t concerned with being right or being persuaded. Instead, they adopt a sharing, open dialogue with their readers that may entice debate or further conversation, but rarely into argument about who’s right or wrong.
• The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. – St. Augustine
  Same with the blogosphere. There are conversations in every corner of the blogosphere. The conversational blogger searches out the ones that interest them most and adds what they can to the conversation.
• It doesn’t matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop – Confucius
  Consistency is really the key to a conversational blogger’s success. They’re not in it for the race. Rather they meet the blogosphere at a pace that they can sustain.
• Rather fail with honor than succeed by fraud – Sophocles
  Staying true to themselves it what makes the conversational blogger succeed – even if their blog does not. It’s more important to them to be honest and authentic then to just have a popular blog.

Okay, fine, one more…

• The greatest mistake in life is to be in constant fear that you’ll make one – Elbert Hubbard
  As conversational bloggers, we mess up from time to time. And it just so happens that are mess ups happen in front of everyone. But hey, who’s perfect anyhow? Not me. And I’m going to continue to make mistakes so that I can learn something I didn’t know.

So there’s six more inspirational quotes that can help the conversational blogger. Each of these speak to me in different ways. I’d love to hear how any of them speak to you.

Do you have a favorite quote of your own that helps guide your blogging? I’d love it if you would share it.

There I was sitting at SOBCon07 over the weekend enjoying the speakers and the conversations they started. Soaking in all kinds of great ideas for taking my blog the conversation (and my business) to the next level.

Then, out of nowhere he said it…what’s been on my mind since I began writing publicly. The meaning in the question I asked weeks back.
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Liz had been telling me (that’s she and I on the right) for weeks that SOBCon07 (link to pictures) was going to be a different kind of conference. How? She kept telling me that we were going to take the comment box to the conference room.

Boy, did that ever happen.

From when I arrived on Friday to meet my friend Adam Kayce to talking WordPress with Lorelle VanFossen til 1:30am Sunday morning, the conference was really one, large conversation. It was incredible, amazing, remarkable. So remarkable that while I’d like to share with you all my experiences I’m sure I’m unable too.
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SOBCon07 is only one week away. Who’s coming? Are you?

The Idea Dude started a neat little idea (I guess that’s why he’s called The Idea Dude). He asked, What’s you SOBCon oneliner? Liz followed up with hers. Now it’s our turn. Me first…

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Sorry, I don’t want to be presumptuous.

Wendy Piersall tagged me with this question a few days back: What Does It Take To Write A Great Blog Post? Kim Dushinski tagged her as part of Mohit Singhania’s Be Original Project.

My first thought…I have no idea. But I know, that’s a cop out.

The very next thing I think is that I can consider a post to be great, but you, the reader (and commenter), ultimately get to decide whether you feel the post is great or not. It’s sort of like me calling myself an expert in something and we already know how I feel about that.
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Yesterday I wrote about how being part of the Ultimate Technorati Favorites Exchange was a waste of my time. I saw it a few weeks back, tried it and found it to have little, if any, benefit for me. I may have gained a couple of readers, but nothing more. And certainly no massive wave of traffic.

Yesterday I also got a caring phone call from my dear friend (who I remain nameless only because I don’t have her permission to bring her into any debate around this topic). A prominent blogger herself, she asked me a very important question, “What if you would have gotten a huge wave of traffic from the meme?”

I thought for a moment…and answered her honestly, “For a week or so I would loved getting all this new traffic. I would have thought getting into Technorati’s Top 100 Favorites was a great thing and I like would have spent a whole bunch more time on it. But like with all traffic-driven memes, it wouldn’t take long until I saw that my concern with Technorati’s Top 100 Favorites was taking me away from writing for the people who read my blog. Then I would have stopped it.”
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You’ve probably seen this meme going around called the Ultimate Technorati Favorites Exchange. Dosh Dosh Gary Lee kicked it off as an experiment to “break into the Technorati Top 100 and determine the exposure and traffic benefits of being included in the Top 100 list.”

Now this ISN’T the Technorati Top 100 Blogs – which is a list of the 100 most linked to blogs. This meme was about breaking into the Top 100 Favorited blogs on Technorati. Very different.

Well, with a lot of work and a whole bunch of links from other bloggers (thank you, by the way), I got into the top 100 last Tuesday. “Pretty neat,” I thought, “Now let’s see how it increases my traffic.”

So giving it a week or so, I checked my traffic this morning and found no change in the past week for referrers coming from Technorati. I did have a massive spike that began on Friday and went through the weekend. But that came from StumbleUpon.
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